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発達障害のパートナーを持つ妻(夫)の会

 今日は久しぶりに師匠(スーパーバイザー)の所へ、今後の研究の相談に行ってきました。

 師匠は、ちょっとクールで変わった人で、スーパーバイザーを引き受けてもらったそもそものきっかけは、EMDRのトレーニングでした。人当たりは良さそうですが、鋭い事を言ってくれて個人的に尊敬している同業者の先生です。

 師匠は、私の子どもと配偶者のADHDの事を一応理解してくれています。発達障害の専門ではないので、その点でのアドバイスは受けられないですが、一緒に考えてくれるので、ずいぶんと助かっています。

 今日は、私の個人的な悩みを少し聞いてもらいました。(もちろん、メインは症例の相談と、研究論文の話です)その悩みとは、配偶者の認知障害の事です。とにかく、さっき言ったこともすぐに忘れてしまい、考えに一貫性がありません。単なる物忘れがひどいというよりも、記憶そのもののプロセスに問題がありそうな感じです。

 いろいろ日常生活の中で、配偶者と関わっていて「困ったこと」を話していたら、師匠がふと、

「発達障害のパートナーを持つ妻(夫)の会を作ったらよさそうだね」

 …確かに、発達障害の子どもを持つ親の会はあるけど、パートナーの会はなさそうです。子育てについての情報はそれなりに増えているけれど、配偶者が発達障害を持っている家族がお互いに情報交換をしたり助け合える機会というのはなかなかないように思います。

 子どもの発達障害では、どう育てるかとか社会との関わりをどうするか、などの問題や体験を共有できるグループを必要とします。パートナーの場合、もちろん仕事のように社会性の問題は共通しますが、配偶者とは基本的には生活を共にする他人ですから、一緒に住んでいていろいろと出てくる日常の問題をどう理解し対応すればいいのか、その悩みを共有できるサポートグループがあればいいなあ、と思います。

 師匠から言われるまでもなく、個人的には絶対に必要だと思うのです。

 誰かがやらんかなあ、と期待する私ですが、師匠は私がやればいいのではないか、と考えたようでした。

 メーリングリストとか、HPをうまく使えば決して不可能ではないとは思います。しかし、どう立ち上げるかについてはまだ全然イメージもわかないし妙案も出てこない。あまPCに詳しくないせいもあって、さてどうしたものか…と思案中です。

 アイデアとしては悪くないんですが、何かいい案ないですかねぇ…?

 その前に、パートナーが発達障害という方にとって、サポートグループがどのくらいニーズがあるのか、どんな援助や情報を欲しいと思っているのかを先に調べないと進まないですね。本当に必要だと思っている人がある程度の人数いることが分かれば、すぐにでも行動を起こしたいところです。

 
 
 

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Comments

自分がそういう立場、状況にない者なので(おまけにADHDにばくぜんとしか知識がないので)、想像で言うことしかできないのですが、あったらいいのではないかと思います。きっと、子供と親としての関係(どう社会のなかで暮らして生きづらくないように感覚をつないであげられるか)ということと、パートナー(大人どうし)の関係とでは、側面、実際の起こること、悩んでしまうことなど違うと思うのです。「大人同士=個人どうし」だからこそ余計に、たとえば相手に振り回されているとかといった感情が生まれてきやすかったりということもあるのかもしれないと思います。
子供のことではないから余計にだれにも相談できなかったり、「こういう性格なんだ」ってとらえている人とかもいるのかもしれないと思いますし・・。きっと今必要だって思っていない人でも、そういう会のことを知ったら、欲しかったんだって感じる人たちはいるのではないかなと思います。

まずは情報交換の掲示板とか、それぞれが悩みや実状、日々感じていることをシェアできるHPとか、紹介のリンク集とかなのかもしれないですね。

すいません、部外者の想像だけで書いてますけど・・・。

Posted by: kunie | 2004.06.16 at 01:45 AM

こんにちは、りゅうですヾ(≧∇≦)〃

新しい事を起こす時はとてもエネルギーが要るものです。
Sanaさんはそれを十分に持ち合わせているように思います。
陰ながら応援しています。

あと、現在うちの長男は薬物療法をやっていますが
これについてどう思われますか?
Sanaさんのところは?
最近薬のおかげで調子がいいので喜んではいるものの、
不確かな不安が付きまとっているのも正直あります。
長男の気持ちが穏やかであれば一番なのですが。。。

Posted by: りゅう | 2004.06.18 at 01:45 PM

>Kunieさん、

 コメントありがとうございます。
掲示板となると、今の私の知識ではどうなることやら…。CSSを勉強しないといけなさそうですね。どうするか、今思案中なんです。

>りゅうさん、

 応援ありがとうございます。
今はちょっとエネルギーが切れてるみたいなので、もう少し補充できてから動こうかと…。

 ぴょろさんは、今は薬物療法は受けていません。ADHDの診断もアメリカで受けたので、近いうちにK大学病院へ行こうかと思っているところです。

 薬物も効果はあるんですけど、作用時間が短いことと症状の改善度の個人差が大きいです。おそらく数年内には、新しい薬が認可されるようです。今の薬よりは、副作用などの問題が少ないようで、これから治療も少しずつ変わってくるかもしれませんね。もしぴょろにお薬が必要、ということになれば多分使うけど慎重に(給薬日を設けるなどして)対応するだろうと思います。

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